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My Brain, the Liar

My depression is here for a visit. The imp in my head whispering dark machinations that I know to be a lie. I guess in some way I could feel this incident coming. I have had 0 progress in my hobbies, in my writing in particular. I also have not played any games in months now. I realized this past weekend that I was not having any fun. I had fun with my kids at the park and then I went to my friend’s house for a cook out. That was fun.

The act of having fun has put a spotlight on the lack of it in my day to day life. The static in my head is back. The fog of lies settles in and I just float buoyant in it. I have a self-loathing that rises from the sea of thoughts like a cerebral Jörmungandr. I feel so small against this tide of darkness and lies.

I need to enact a battle plan. Draw my blade, summon my armies, lay waste to the oncoming blood tide.

Step 1: Notify my wife that the depression is back
Step 2: Double check that I am taking all medications
Step 3: Am I hungry? Then Eat
Step 4: Disconnect from all technology an hour before bed so I can have peaceful rest.

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